We want to start by thanking you for caring so much about other Christian singles that you take the time to learn strategies to be more Christ-like in your dating. By reading these devotionals, you’re committing yourself to not only bettering yourself, but you’re learning skills and gaining knowledge to help treat others better.
Unfortunately, not everyone you’re going to meet on this journey is like you. Today, we want to talk about what to do when someone you meet or someone you go on a date with doesn’t treat you the way you should be treated.
“Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult. On the contrary, repay evil with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing.” – 1 Peter 3:9
Before we dig into the scriptures, we want to make something very clear. You never have to stay in a situation where you’re being mistreated or feel unsafe. If you go on a date and someone is doing something that you’re uncomfortable with or that is meant to hurt you, it’s okay to get yourself out of that situation.
With that in mind, let’s take a look at the scripture. When someone wrongs you, it can be tempting to retaliate. If they call you a bad name, make fun of you, stand you up, disrespect you, or talk bad about you behind your back—a lot of people’s first instinct is to fire right back, tit for tat. Peter clearly tells us not to do that.
Did God do this because he doesn’t want us “to get even”? In a sense, yes. But the main reason for this advice is to protect your heart. Additionally, Peter goes on to say you may inherit blessing from this type of response.
So, what does this look like in practice? Well, here’s an example. Let’s say you go out with someone, and you find out later that they posted on social media right after the date asking why being single is so terrible? It’s probably a safe assumption to think that is meant toward you.
The temptation may be to comment on the post or text them and tell them just how terrible they are! Instead, though, let’s do as Peter tells us. One way you might respond is to send them a text thanking them for a great date, telling them you think they’re a lot of fun to be around, but you don’t think you’re interested in a second date.
Notice that we didn’t attack them or take it as an opportunity to repay the insult with another. Notice also, though, that we still shared we weren’t interested in another date. Sometimes people misinterpret this verse in relation to dating to think they have to continue doing things they don’t want to. That’s not the case.
Be kind. Offer a blessing in return if possible. Look to the Lord for wisdom on how best to respond.
📝 Here’s Some Reflection Questions:
- Have there been situations in the past where you responded to someone you were dating in a way that wasn’t in line with what Peter is talking about?
- If so, is there a better way you could have responded?
- What’s a plan you can put in place for the future in case someone wrongs you to ensure you respond properly?
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